Saturday, July 6, 2013

Moving on the Hottest Day

I've been busy for some time now with plans and preparations for my mother's move.  Her move was delayed by several weeks.  Originally it was tentatively planned for mid-June.  In retrospect it worked out better having the move early this month as it gave me a bit of time to recover from my whirlwind trip to eastern Canada and New York.  I am also thankful that mom only had two rooms of stuff to be moved, (albeit there are too many things for those two rooms).  Two and a half years ago is when I had to sort through a lifetime of her accumulated treasures and try to fit it into two small rooms at the first facility.

When you move a parent from one facility to another, there are so many things to do besides simply packing, unpacking and finding a place for everything. There are also the interviews, financial aspects, preparing for services needed (hair, dentist, doctor, shopping, etc.), filling out paperwork, making sure all the right documents are on hand and transferred, notifying the insurance company about the move, transferring telephone service and making sure your parent has funds available on hand to them each month for their needs. Then there are the side arrangements just to get out of town:  preparing the car, the hotel accommodations, and thinking about meals while away (fast food is not so good for diabetics but are often the standby for a quick meal), looking after extra snacks for my mother who always has a list of "wants" when I visit since she cannot just get these things for herself.  Last but  not least, there was a shopping list and shopping for her needs (toiletry articles and such like).


This time there were a few additional things to purchase. We wanted to give mom some flowers and a card welcoming her to her new home.  We also needed a small stand or table her mini-refrigerator so it could be lifted off the floor for better accessibility.  We tried to get the new home to "loan" us one but couldn't wait around for their answer.  We had a hard time to find a new one in the right size but managed to pick up something from a local thrift store. We also decided at the last moment to buy a new 32 inch flat screen television.  Mom already had a smaller  flat screen television but I thought with her poorer vision it would be a nice treat to have a bigger screen.  In addition, the dresser top was quite large and a new, larger television fit perfectly onto it.


After all the excitement of the move and high expectations, mom's first night in her new home was not up to expectations.  She was in a tremendous amount of pain and this was largely due to the facility not being properly prepared.  The ceiling track had not been charged up in advance and so was unusable.  The bed itself had no trapeze overhead to help with her transfer and they had to bring in a manual lift which wasn't big enough and squeezed her causing pain.  I was very disappointed and was feeling quite low about it all.  The good news is that the management immediately met with us and we discussed the situation.  I was happy for the proactive approach and hope that things will improve in a significant way very soon.  However,  I think some of the issues will continue to be issues until the new occupational therapist (OT) starts working and does a full assessment of the needs.  I will also want to keep an eye on the lack of certain other medical supplies (over the bed table stands, etc.) and see what I can do to fill in these gaps.

Other than that the facility itself is beautiful and the staff seem very kind. I didn't have time to take photos but I did have a look around at some parts of the facility.  It is very high end and more secure than where she lived before. Mom also has a view of the river and the courtyard from her window.


The move took place over the hottest days of the summer thus far and I was exhausted over the hectic two days of activity. Thank goodness for air conditioning.  However even good things have their down sides.  Over the course of my sleeping I was awakened with deep cramping in my leg.  I've noticed that cold can cause these very deep, painful cramps which nothing can help.  I unplugged the air conditioning unit at the hotel as it was too high for me to set lower.  I was able to get back to sleep.

After day 2 of reorganizing her room and finalizing paperwork for the administration, I was able to get back home late last night.  I couldn't call mom as her phone hook up was delayed.  Due to to last week's flood disaster in Calgary,  I was told that many technicians from the province were dispatched to Calgary to try and help with needs there. The best I could do was to get mom's phone service operational on Day 2 of her move in. I was anxious about her not having a way to communicate with me after the trials of her first night and I did a lot of praying for her. I asked her to call me as soon as her phone was operating.


Mom was able to call me before noon today and she sounded like she was doing fine.  I called her in the afternoon and she didn't seem to be too needy on the phone. I hope she wasn't pretending for my benefit but I am trusting she will make the best of this move.  The staff were able to help her today and she had met some new residents so we are both anticipating a positive experience ahead. I think by the time I visit her next month she will be feeling more settled and hopefully things will be well underway (hopefully completed) with the OT assessment.

For more Skywatch photos, click here.

(All photos taken on the drive back to Vancouver.  Bridge photos are taken on the new Port Mann Bridge connecting Surrey to Port Coquitlam).

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

So glad to hear the move went well. Your sky shots are lovely!

Cindy said...

Oh dear, it sounds like it was quite an ordeal for your mother and yourself, too. I hope she is enjoying her new home now, a few days later.
Your sky shots are really beautiful.
I'm Praying for your mom.
Hugs, cindy

Joanne Noragon said...

It seems your mother is trying her best, too. All the best to all of you.

Buck said...

Good luck with your Mum; I hope she likes her new residence! As a T1, I know how you feel about fast food. Eating at home is always better for me, but sometimes life has other plans for us.

Your sky photos are gorgeous.

OneStonedCrow said...

Your Mom will make the best of the move Penny, and I'm sure that she deeply appreciates her caring daughter, knowing that you're only a phone-call away ...

... love the road pics

Lynda said...

It is very tiring helping parents to make the decision to go to this type facility - - both emotionally and definitely physically exhausting. It has been 13 years ago that we moved my mom from New State to Tennessee. She was impressed how nice people treated her here - - - even if everything wasn't exactly the way we would have wanted - - but it was her decision and she made the best of it. Life is easier when we are raising children than taking care of parents. I wish there had been a class available to us to cover all the things we needed to know!

Susan said...

Oh, you are such a good daughter, tending to your Mom's needs, making her feel comfortable and wanting the best for her. I hope the new facility is good and very attentive to her.

I've seen, from my own experience, that when families are VERY involved, visiting frequently and monitoring, the care is better. That is the truth. Susan

affectioknit said...

Very best wishes with the move!

~Have a lovely day!

Hildegarde said...

Congrats for being able to comment on my blog, with all steps being in dutch :-)
The top skies are beautiful and very special. I read all about the moving of your mom, an exhausting big matter, I hope your mom will be fine in this new facility. I can't get a good idea of the distances, Flanders is packed, we all live close to each other in a tiny country.

Beth Zimmerman said...

Sorry the move wasn't more smooth but delighted to hear that she seems to be settling in well!

Joyful said...

Hi Beth, the move itself was very smooth. Trying to fit in all the meetings was a bit chaotic as the administration has a lot of things they want/need to cover for themselves as each new resident moves in.

Joyful said...

Hello Hildegarde, sorry I didn't mention the distance but it is approximately a 5 hour drive one way to mom's city.

Joyful said...

Hi Lynda, yes it is very exhausting. We moved mom from one facility to another due to the lack of quality care. I am hoping that things will be better in the new place though the first few days haven't impressed me much. I have to had faith that things WILL improve.

Joyful said...

Susan, I know what you mean. I am very involved but I live far away. I can't get there nearly as often as I would like but I will be monitoring everything and trying to visit as often as I can. I thank you for your well wishes.

Joyful said...

Hi Joanne, yes she is trying very hard and it is stressful for her and for us. She can't/won't talk about anything that needs to be discussed simply because she is too tired. You would think people who manage and work at a care home understand that but they don't.

Joyful said...

Hi Graham, I know mom will give it a good shot. Thank goodness for the telephone system since mom doesn't know how to use a computer.

The drive to mom's city is very beautiful through the high mountain passes. But it also means I don't make the trip much through the long winter months. Too dangerous.

Joyful said...

Hi Buck, thank you for your visit and your kind comments. As a fellow diabetic, I know you understand about the challenges that diet can present especially when on the road. I try to buy a salad whenever I can, even from a fast food place just to supplement the not so good stuff.

Joyful said...

Thank you Cindy for praying with us. We need it. Hugs. xx

Vores have said...

Great pictures you show Joyful. Wish you a good Sunday - hope all is well with you. Hugs Hanne Bente

Linda said...

Oh, Penny, God bless you both! What a wrenching time for both of you. I am in similar situations with my mother and my in-laws. There sure are a lot of things that tug at the heart. Take good care of yourself during this time, too, dear Penny.

Linda

Elisabeth said...

Penny, moves are never easy...even if its a smooth one. Speaking from experience moving three time over a 5yr period!

I know the feeling of moving a parent, in your case to your mom's new home, but what I had to go through is to move my dear aunt into an assisted living facility is such a difficult situation. Lovely scenery photos you've shared, and thanks for sharing your thoughtful and caring post! xo

Linda said...

Nice photos! I sure hope things go well for your mom.

Gattina said...

I can imagine that it was a huge work with the moving of your mom ! But still you had time and the good idea to take these beautiful pictures !

Denise said...

glad the move was successful, prayers continue for you and your mom.

Anonymous said...

So glad the big move went okay and your mom seems settled in her new location. Lovely sky photos.

EG CameraGirl said...

WOW! Moving your mom turned into major event, didn't it? I hope everything gets smoother and smoother and that her needs are met.

Joyful said...

Thank you CameraGirl, yes the move was a bigger event than I had anticipated. The adjustment period will also take longer than anticipated but day by day I hope to hear things are going well.

Joyful said...

I appreciate your prayers so much dear heart. Big hugs. xx

Joyful said...

I was inspired by the beautiful sunset on the way home. Unfortunately I could not capture all of it.

Al said...

Good luck to your mom, that doesn't sound like a pleasant move.

Anonymous said...

Interesting story with amazing sky views.

Rosemary said...

Your mother is so lucky and seems very appreciative for your help in moving her and helping her adjust to her new home. It is so important to have outside help whenever we have to rely on a facility for our care. Wishing you and your mother happiness.

Farida said...

You were able to capture the sky beautifully and each photo depicts a different move. Also I pray that your mom is in a better place not. Take care and enjoy the rest of the week!

clairz said...

Your mother is lucky to have such a kind, thoughtful, and organized daughter. When we can no longer stay in our home, we have a local facility picked out that has 3 different levels of care. They will do the moving as we progress (regress?) from fully independent to semi-independent to needing nursing care. Lucky for us, it seems like a very lovely and lively place. Thank goodness these types of places have improved from what nursing homes were like years ago.

Beaufiul photos, Penny.

Joyful said...

It is good you have found a facility that has different levels of care since it is very difficult to move from one facility to another when you need to. I recommend you stay in your own home as long as you can ;-)

stardust said...

I hope your mother has settled comfortably now. Moving on hottest days is a tough thing but you did it nice and patiently. Japan’s summer is notoriously hot and humid and this year it has been terribly so, which makes me feel already worn out. Stay healthy and cool.

Yoko

Steffi said...

Very beautiful photos!

Pat said...

That sounds like quite an ordeal for you and your mom--getting moved into a new facility. I'm glad she's settling in now and things are getting sorted out. The new facility sounds really nice. You are such a good daughter!

maryaustria said...

I hope your mother has settled in now and fees well. All my best wishes!
Your sky photos are gorgeous! Fantastic shots!

Unknown said...

Hope this facility will be beneficial to your mother's health! The last pic on the bridge is awesome! Thank you for visiting me earlier!

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