Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dating. Show all posts

Monday, January 30, 2023

What.. Where...How? - Tuesday 4 Meme

What.. Where...How?

It's time for Tuesday 4 and we're back with our host Annie at Cottage by the Sea.

Let's ask ourselves some questions.

1. What was the worst date you ever went on?

I can't quite recall his name but I think it was Phil. It was a blind date and we met up for the one and only time at a coffee shop rather than at a restaurant. I didn't want to do dinner in case things didn't go so well. 

I was actually looking forward to meeting him but he started off rudely by telling me I looked nervous instead of saying something nice.  I thought to myself if he was a good man he wouldn't point out my discomfort if he noticed anything and instead he would say something to put me at ease.  I wasn't actually even really that nervous and certainly not obviously since I have quite a bit of experience with small talk and meeting strangers in general.  I just wanted things to go well enough even if it didn't work out for the longer term and that the experience would be useful for dating in general.

But the next thing he did was bore me to tears for about 2 hours and a half hours. He'd brought along several of his photo albums and proceeded to show me every single photo and describe everything in each of them. I did my best to be polite but seriously???  I didn't know him or anyone in the photos and it was excruciating to sit through a description of every photo especially since they were not what I would call 'artsy' photos but simple day to day kind of photos.  I wouldn't have minded at all if he'd selected a few photos to introduce me to people in his life and if kept his explanations of them to the point.  That way I might actually learn something about him.  It would have also been nice if he'd bothered to ask anything about me and my life since I didn't take photos along, lol. When I finally had enough I made my excuses and said my goodbyes. Needless to say I never contacted him again and he made no effort to contact me.

2. How was the nicest date you ever had?

In my early years I had nice dates but not with anyone I could really connect with as a life partner.  I can recall going to a coffee shop with one teacher. It was a romantic setting with candle light coffee, good music and good conversation.  Though I wasn't attracted to this man, he later stayed a friend and I did enjoy the ambience and folk music at the venue. There were dates with other over the years.  But life was very busy and demanding with many responsibilities and I didn't have much time for dating and building a relationship.  When I did take time out I found I enjoyed romantic dates or doing simple things like a quiet  dinner out, a stroll on the sandy beach under moonlight, or riding around in a sporty car, top rolled down and the wind in my hair.

I'm a romantic at heart but I need more than romance or a good provider or adventurer. I wanted a love connection with someone who was also deeply committed to God and who followed a Christian lifestyle.  It has always been important to me to find a man who had a deep faith.  It took many years before I finally did meet the man I am married to now.  We met while I was on a missions visit to Kenya.  We had many challenges to overcome (family illnesses, commitments to jobs/projects/dependants and so on) before we could be together even after we were married.  But we hung in there and we are together now.  Over time, as we courted and got to know one another we also did simple things.  There wasn't a lot of free time as we were also working but from time to time there was time for romance and just doing the simple things of life.  My DH is not, by nature, a romantic man but once in awhile he gets inspired. I remember strolling on a boardwalk under the African moon with hippos in the adjacent river nearby.  It was also somewhat exciting because African wild animals were close by and hippos are also quite dangerous.  I also remember another time when he introduced me to Ethiopian food at a wonderful restaurant in Nairobi.  We chose to dine al fresco in an area nicely decorated with Ethiopian decor. We fed each other beef tibs, took photos and laughed a lot that night.  Neither of us had experienced being fed by someone else since we were babies, so it made us giggle.

3. Where did you grow up and how did you like it? Are you far away from there now?

I grew up in the far north in Dawson Creek and Ft. St. John. I now live in Vancouver which is about 1200 km south of where I grew up.  The cities in the north are very small and in those days there were very few amenities.  Winters were long and cold with an excess of snow.  I liked it enough but always knew I would leave one day to gain new experiences.  Small town living far away from the big city isn't really my thing. The people I went to school with and my age mates were not interested in travel or furthering their education though things have changed.  People now travel a lot more and many go away for further study though often returning to the north to live.  It is still cold up there but it seems like there is far less snow. 

4.  What did kids do for fun and dates you were young?

We children went to church a lot. We were not allowed to date until at least 16 if not 17 and to be honest, I wasn't even that interested in dating.  I was rather reserved, shy and a homebody. When I started dating I was almost ready to go away to university.  My first real boyfriend was a very nice and respectful person and my parents liked him for that reason.  We didn't have much in common though and and we didn't date very long because I was planning to leave and go to university.  He knew that and he had no similar plans. We didn't do much except hang out with age mates and drive through the small town to people watch. Driving through town was a favourite activity of our age mates.  Other times my boyfriend and I would simply sit and talk outside my house with mom and dad and the siblings all inside. There really wasn't much to do besides drive around or go to a movie. Back then young people didn't have a lot of extra money to go out dining like they seem to do today. If they had extra money they were usually saving to buy a car, buy clothes or move into their own place, that kind of thing.  

Thanks for stopping by!

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