Humankind has not woven
the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the
web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things
connect.
At long last my mother's new room in the facility will be ready in the middle of September. This is one month later than the original date we were given. It is a shame because it means I won't be visiting mom until after her birthday. I'll also be attending a care meeting with staff after the move so I will at least get a chance to visit with mom over a longer period of time than usual. She will like that because she gets lonely with most of her family members living far away.
I'm hoping that things will improve for mom's state of mind once she moves into her room and that the new staff on the floor will be more compassionate and sensitive. I haven't been impressed with things at the new facility so far. If it weren't for the knowledge that many people are praying with and for me, I would be feeling very stressed out about the entire situation. In fact a few weeks ago I was very stressed out . But after much prayer, I have calmed down and am trying to take things day by day. I also talk to mom daily. Sometimes several times a day. When her anxiety levels rise, I just try to keep her calm and talk her through it.
Some of you will remember that mom is also still waiting for several pieces of medical equipment. These have all been on order for awhile but they are slow in arriving. I'm hoping by tomorrow (they didn't and neither did we get a phone call) she will have most of the items. I don't think the Occupational Therapist ever ordered the over the bed hospital tables that she can get on loan from the local Red Cross. I haven't followed up on it yet because there are so many others things to follow up on and deal with. The big ticket item we are waiting for is the demonstration model wheelchair. It should be delivered next week if all goes according to plan but I'll believe it when I "see it". It is a demonstration model so it won't be customized. But it will have some features that should make mom more comfortable.
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| Mom's new wheelchair will have 6 wheels like this one. |
We are most excited about her move and the arrival of the new chair because living on the ground level will give her more freedom to get outside for fresh air. She misses that so much. She doesn't like getting into the elevator due to poor eye sight. Once she is on the ground level it will be a little easier for her to navigate on her own to get outdoors. What a simple thing it is for most of us to go outside and yet I wonder if we fully appreciate the blessing that is.
Fresh air won't address my mother's loneliness at not seeing her children so often. but it will help her a lot.
I get lonely too but for different reasons. If you've been a caregiver I'm sure you know the loneliness of shouldering the burden of care for loved ones. We want to look after our loved ones but sometimes it just takes so much out of us. In part, it explains why I've been posting a lot lately about my financial and health matters. Though it is rare, there are times I just want to reach out and share my heart and experiences with others and feel connected to others by hearing from them.
Isn't that what the blogging experience is all about?
When the response is resounding silence, it can exacerbate the lonely experience. When the response to a post are great comments, encouragement or shared experiences, suddenly the world doesn't seem like such a lonely place. It's nice to make blogging friends and sometimes those blogging friends get to be friends you meet in real life. Now that's special!
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| I love the pink in these flowers and wanted to share them with you. |
Have a wonderful weekend.
Update - August 18, 2013- I learned that my nephew & his girlfriend will be visiting my mom at the end of this month for her birthday. God is good!
Note: I wrote this post for 5 Minute Friday but discovered later that the prompt word "lonely" was for last week :-0
Update - August 18, 2013- I learned that my nephew & his girlfriend will be visiting my mom at the end of this month for her birthday. God is good!
Note: I wrote this post for 5 Minute Friday but discovered later that the prompt word "lonely" was for last week :-0
19 comments:
Joy I am so glad to hear about your Mom's new room! Fab. It will be so wonderful once she's in and settled.
And hugs on the loneliness. I definitely agree! You know my life is kinda different now from what it was and I often feel like life has "shrunk", especially in terms of the amount of people I see on a day to day basis. Not always in a bad way (I like to think you keep the real kindred spirit connections) but it can be a bit isolating sometimes. So God bless the (good parts of the) internet, and the connections blogging can bring. Have a great Friday! (virtual) HUGS! xxx
Hey Rachel, so nice to hear from you. I know from reading your blog just how much your life has changed. I think it takes courage to forge ahead and try to make a new life out of it all. I too have had many changes in my life over the past several years and am trying to make the best of it all. I try to remember that life is so much harder for many others and that I am truly blessed. Nonetheless at times it is isolating and lonely. I guess we all go through those feelings at some point. When we do, it is nice to know that others understand and care. Hugs and a good Friday to you too. xxx
It's been rough on you pulling together your mother's new surroundings. I do hope the new room and furnishing just fall into place in the end; you will have so much more peace of mind.
Joanne, it has been rough indeed. Hopefully everything does fall into place but more importantly, I hope that things improve for mom's sake. Thanks for visiting :-)
You are doing a wonderful job of looking after your mother's needs. I am full of admiration!
Good luck! Your mother is fortunate that you are looking after her interests.
Thank you for your visit and your kind words!
Thank you Clair. I haven't really been able to accomplish much but I'm guessing it would be a lot worse if I wasn't involved. I hope you are enjoying the rest of your summer.
Dear Joyful....Thank you so much for your visit and comment on my blog. My busy week of entertaining is now over and lots of beautiful memories were made.
Hope your Mom is doing well. Susan
Things definitely sound more optimistic for your mom. How did she end up so far from you - - - or did she want to be near where she had been living? It is difficult to be a caregiver when they live close by but I can't imagine trying to do it long distance. You are right about the blogging - - - many new friends to keep us encouraged.
Mom didn't want to leave the place where she has been living for many years. It has been hard to look after her needs being so far away but we have to manage it. Thanks so much for your visit and your kind comments.
Dear Susan, I'm glad you had a great time with your guests. I'm sure they have a wonderful time too as you are such a thoughtful host!
I'm so glad your mom will be able to live on the ground floor so she can go outside more easily. I pray for peace for her and for you. I have never had to take care of any elderly family member, so I haven't experienced that kind of stress. My parents were healthy pretty much right up to the day each of them died (Dad- at 83 of a heart attack and Mom- at 85 of an aortic dissection). They lived in their own home from 1960 when they had it built until they died in 2003. They were both into health and fitness most of their adult lives.
Thank you for your kind comment and congratulations on the birth of our 4th grandchild. Jerry and I are thrilled. We'll meet him in a week or so and stay with them for about a week to help care for the 2 older boys. It's an 8-hour drive to SoCal, so we don't get down there very often.
I have been very neglectful of blogging (reading or writing) lately as I've been keeping busy doing other things...e.g., home maintenance projects, Gideons Auxiliary stuff (I'm the president of our Auxiliary) and church stuff. I've just started teaching Sunday school again after a 15-year hiatus while I sang with the worship team. I felt led to start teaching the first-through-fifth-graders because no one was stepping up to the plate to do that and our youth pastor, who ministers to the junior high and high school kids, was basically babysitting the first-through-fifth graders. He doesn't really have time to prepare a Bible lesson for them because he has so much other stuff on his plate. So I've been teaching the kids about Elijah and now Elisha, using CEF (Child Evangelism Fellowship) curriculum along with a flannel board. The kids love flannel graph stories! Anyway, those are some of my excuses for not blogging! I hope you find peace and contentment and good fellowship with other Christians in order to eliminate your loneliness.
Thank you Pat for your thoughtful comments. Have fun with your family members. Thanks too for your good wishes about fellowship. To be honest, I do not have a whole lot of time or energy for new friendships though I make it a goal to meet new friends whenever I can. I may also be attending a new church soon. I am just checking into that possibility. I do get together with current friends rather inconsistently for a number of reasons. I do try, but current circumstances make it difficult at the present time. The loneliness I feel has more to do with the isolation one feels when under the burden of an adult caregiver. Things will eventually change. Right now, I need to keep strong for my mother's sake. Anyway, it is great that you are stepping up to teach Sunday School class. I think that is a wonderful work you are doing.
Prayerfully, everything will fall into place, Ms Joyful. God is and has always been good :)
Hello Penny. Thank you as always for making the time to visit my blog and give me some encouragement, in the middle of all this with your Mum too. And your own health concerns. I am in agreement about the blogging world. Sometimes it is the only place I feel a connection. Life is so busy and people are so preoccupied. However the internet can also make loneliness feel so much worse can't it? I am so thankful to read and connect with so many lovely souls all over the world.
I am not a carer but I know people who are. It is a very tough and lonely road. I hope your Mum is enjoying her wheelchair and that the wait for the ground floor room is not too long and lonely. xx
Hi Joyful! Thank you for visiting my blog and joining it too. I look forward to getting to know you better.
Getting good care for the elderly is so tough. They need so much, and most of all patience. I hope this new place will be just the right situation for your Mom. That wheelchair looks amazing! Maybe she will need to take driving lessons!
Peace,
Ceil
I read a scripture this morning that may help you. it's found din I Peter 5: 6 & 7Therefore humble yourselves [demote, lower yourselves in your own estimation] under the mighty hand of God, that in due time He may exalt you,
7 Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully.
Loneliness and feeling like I was the only one who cared about the things that I care so much about were the reasons that I took up blogging and I found that I was not alone and it really has helped a lot.
God is so very, very good. He loves you, my friend, and He sees how difficult this whole experience has been on you.
Loe and hugs, Cindy
Jan, Farida Ceila and Cindy, thank you ladies for your visit to my blog and your kind comments. I really appreciate it!
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