Speaking of the hospital, mom is to be released on Monday if all goes well. I couldn't believe it and she is very happy though I won't be here to bring her home this time. My brother will arrive over the weekend while I finish packing mom's things. I am trying to pack as much as possible before I go back home for a rest. It has been a rough week as there is so much here to sort through. I won't be done when I leave but I will have done most of the hard work. Whew!
As one daughter of an aging parent, I ask any of you out there who are also aging, "please do not put off getting rid of junk, personal papers, old documents or new documents with identification on it." One day if you do not take care of this stuff, it is likely your older daughter will have to do it for you during an already stressful time. I've tried for more than two decades to help my mom sort through things. She wouldn' t hear of it. She always wanted to do it herself.
In the decades that followed, mom never got to enjoy any of these items as they were all boxed up waiting for the day when they would be sorted. While she did make some progress getting rid of some items about five years ago, it seems that clothing, papers and photos were an area of difficulty to deal with. This is mostly what I have been dealing with at a time when I am also trying to deal with her many needs and issues at the local hospital and attend to the business of finding her a long term critical care placement. It has been a very challenging week and I'm just glad I've been physically able to handle as much of the packing and sorting as I've been able to get to. While mom is coming home in a few days she knows, and has agreed to being put on a waiting list for a nursing home.
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18 comments:
My heart aches for what you are going thru. I have an aging parent who won't let go. It seems to really stress her and makes her worse. I finally decided to just worry about it when the next step occurs. It seems to give her comfort as she remembers the past, while touching and handling her things. It is even more stressful for someone who lives far away. Our hearts are with you as you move through this stage.
what a beautiful day!
happy Weekend!
xoxo, fickle
Anvaya Cove
You are so right about the sorting thing. I've had to do it twice, once for my mom and then my aunt. I'm in the process of getting my fire goods sorted and believe me a lot is being cut back! (garbage) The fire kind of made us all realize how much unnecessary stuff one collects and can do without. Hope you get rested. You deserve a break. I like you sky pics too.
Gwendolyn, thank you for your kind words. When one has a parent like us who won't let go of stuff, there is really nothing to be done but try to let them have their way. I've had to do the same and now I am dealing with the "next step". The only thing with mom is she isn't comforted by her stuff. It stresses her out knowing it needs to be organized and that others might go through her things. Now I am having to do just that so I was hoping to encourage any older folks to get rid of their things if they are able and before someone else has to do it for them. My heart is also with you as you seem to be dealing with the same thing. Big hugs xx
fickleinpink, thank you for your visit and a wonderful weekend to you too!
KleinsteMotte, I feel for you. I've had to do it twice also. In my own home I have too much stuff also and I've been working on decluttering. It will take me awhile yet.
Lovely. We dream of blue skies here :)
My brother died suddenly many years ago in Sweden and I learned my lesson then. In the hot, hot attic of his building there were stored both my brother's stuff and my dad's papers. Bags and bags of stuff, papers, old photos, stories by my dad and on and on. I went through it all. I was 70 this summer -- I have no kids and I plan to leave very little behind.
I'm sorry about your mom and I hope someone who reads your post will learn from it.--Inger
Lovely skies. But I'm sorry your mom has been ill. I know it can be hard - have experienced some of these issues with my own mom. I'm glad you have a brother to help. They can be lifesavers!
And thanks for stopping by my blog!
Thanks Mike! Blue skies are awesome. I leave for Vancouver soon where weather has also been lovely but is expected to turn to rain soon. I think you're probably familiar with that.
Inger, I'm very sorry you lost both your dad and your brother. I'm lucky I still have my brother. I'm like you, no children and I hope to leave very little behind when I go...have been trying to get the decluttering done at my home but mom's has to come first.
Leslie, thank you for your visit and your kind words. I hope you get everything sorted out with your mom.
Beautiful vapor track in the skies. I know your mom is so happy to be home.
Beautiful vapor track in the skies. I know your mom is so happy to be home.
Lovely skies. But I'm sorry your mom has been ill. I know it can be hard - have experienced some of these issues with my own mom. I'm glad you have a brother to help. They can be lifesavers!
And thanks for stopping by my blog!
fickleinpink, thank you for your visit and a wonderful weekend to you too!
You are so right about the sorting thing. I've had to do it twice, once for my mom and then my aunt. I'm in the process of getting my fire goods sorted and believe me a lot is being cut back! (garbage) The fire kind of made us all realize how much unnecessary stuff one collects and can do without. Hope you get rested. You deserve a break. I like you sky pics too.
Thanks Mike! Blue skies are awesome. I leave for Vancouver soon where weather has also been lovely but is expected to turn to rain soon. I think you're probably familiar with that.
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